Loss is one of those inevitably beautiful tragedies in life. We cannot predict or stop it from happening; it catches us in the cruelest of surprises and turns our world upside down and inside out before tossing us into a pit of our darkest emotions. Having a loved one taken from your life, for one reason or another, is one of the most difficult things to work through, and one of the few things in life that you will never get over. Rather it grows to be a part of who you become; ingrained in your being from that point forward.
Grief is inescapable and it consumes everyone differently. Your mind, heart, and soul are weighed down by the gaping hole left by their absence. What’s normal and important has suddenly changed entirely. You hurt from the inside out each time you move. Your throat burns each time you try to mutter their name.
The seven stages of grief are a joke. There is no clear cut path through the forest of grief; that would make it far too easy to get to the other side. There is no other side. You become lost in the forest for the rest of your time, forced to start over, to make the best of your new life without that person.
Denial comes in waves every so often. Acceptance is like an acid rain on the brink of Spring. There is no way to hide from it, so eventually, we learn that we must embrace it. There is a dark beauty in the raw pain of grief. The pure love that must have been felt in order to experience that much hurt when the human on the other end of the love was taken is remarkable. That love, in and of itself, is something that not everyone has the opportunity to feel. It almost makes it worth it. You know that it was worth it. If we never feel pain, then it means that we never lost something that we loved enough that would make us feel anything. Emotions create emotions; good, bad, or indifferent.
Grief doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Obviously, it is one of the most internally painful things that we can experience, but it is beautiful. Though that person has moved on from this life, you have not forgotten them. You will never forget them. And you will spend the rest of your life loving and remembering them for all that they were. Whoever they were, they deserve their life legacy to be remembered and cherished by someone who loves them. If that means that we must feel the pain of their past life weighing down on our shoulders, then so be it.
Allow the shadowed beauty of life, love, death, and grief to wash over you and know that this life is not much more than a beautiful tragedy.
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